Archive for February 21st, 2008
My avatar has better hair than I do
How bizarre would it be if I printed off my avatar and took it to my stylist and said, “like this.” Yeah, I thought so. Borderline psycho.
So it has come to my attention…or not…that my memory is not doing me any favors. At least three times in the last week my memory has had a short-circuit and failed me. Let’s see if I can remember…
Saturday I got into the van with Tom and the boys and immediately couldn’t find my sunglasses. My elfin-made, dried with the tears of fairies, waited for four freaking months and paid a fortune for, sunglasses. Tom was driving, I was tearing the van apart. I could read his mind (and he was stunned later when I told him, word for word, what he was thinking): “you waited four months and paid a freaking fortune for those sunglasses and you lost them?” Ten minutes later, I shifted in my seat, and there they were, stuck between my legs where I put them when I got into the van, got distracted by the boys, and promptly forgot that I put them there.
Yesterday morning I was in a hurry getting the boys into the van (seeing a theme here?) to drive A to school. Tom helped out, getting J strapped into his carseat. I got into the car, turned around to make sure both boys were buckled up, and lost my keys. Where were they? In the ignition, where I put them when I got in.
I…I can’t remember the third one, but it was similar to the first two.
So now I have to decide…is my family history of Alzheimer’s hitting me at the tender age of 34, or do I just need to learn to live in the moment better? I think it’s the latter, and I’d better get on that before the former bites me in the ass.
There was something else…what was it…oh yeah. And y’all probably thought I forgot…
I probably should print off my avatar and go for that haircut, huh?
Thursday Thirteen: things I've learned about staying safe in the backcountry, just by watching the evening news
This winter the Rocky Mountains have gotten a whole lotta snow. Record snowfall, as a matter of fact. This brings out the winter outdoorsmanpeople. Skiing, snowshoeing, snowmobiling…all things that involve snow and cold and being outside in both of those. Not my cuppa tea. But, snuggled here in my warm home watching the news, I’ve learned a few things about staying safe while doing all those insane fun outdoor activities. There seems to be a huge increase in snowmobilers and day hikers getting stranded. Please keep in mind that I don’t actually do these things, I just watch the news and figure it out on my own. Enjoy.
Thirteen Things I’ve learned about staying safe in the backcountry, just by watching the evening news 1. First and foremost, if you want to stay safe in the mountains, just don’t go outside. Stay in by the crackling fire and sip coffee drinks liberally dosed with Kahlua, Bailey’s Irish Cream, or Frangelico. Or all three.
2. If you do insist on going outside, dress in layers. Many layers. I understand that cotton is about the worst thing you can wear, as it just sops up moisture and gets cold and clammy against your skin. Just…wear layers, and for more details, go hit REI or something for suggestions.
3. Just assume, right from the get-go, that your cell phone won’t work. So don’t rely on it as a “hey, come rescue me” device. I lose my cell phone signal driving through my neighborhood (hills and valleys cut it off), so don’t assume it’s going to work up in the mountains.
4. Even if it’s an afternoon trip, take enough food for a couple of days. Or for a Thanksgiving feast. A granola bar and a water bottle just ain’t gonna cut it. You really wanna be starving up there, waiting for someone to find you? Again, ask the dudes at REI for suggestions, they’re the experts.
5. You need an emergency kit. Don’t go without one. Again, and the dudes at REI are gonna just loooove me, go see them. It doesn’t have to be big, but it should have one of those space-agey silver blankets to keep you warm, a first-aid kit, a mirror (so you can reflect the sun up at searchers), and waterproof matches.
6. Never, ever go alone. Yes, it’s peaceful, but it’s dangerous and can peace you right to death. Literally.
7. Never, ever split up. See above.
8. Let someone at home know exactly where you are going and when to expect you back.
9. If there is a place at the trailhead or ranger’s station to sign in, do so. Name, where you are going, and when you expect to return. Then sign out so they know you’re out of there.
10. For God’s sake, heed the avalanche warnings. They’re not there to cramp your style, they’re there to keep you alive.
11. Get an avalanche beacon. Wear it.
12. Extra gas for snowmobiles is a must. You never know when you’re going to need it.
13. Watch.The.Weather.Reports. If Weather Babe says that bad weather is moving in, believe her and take caution. In fact, just stay home and watch Weather Babe.
Ok, that’s my “I stay home and don’t like to be cold in the snow” list of how to be safe. If you’re an outdoorsy person, please don’t flame. I gathered all this, literally, from watching the news. Leave a gentle comment. Otherwise, go make up the coffee, I’ll pull out the Frangelico.
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