Archive for July, 2009

Happy Anniversary, sweetie. Lucky 13. I love you.

Just a quickie today.

• Sarah Palin is leaving politics for good. I know this is the 4th of July holiday, I didn’t realize it was Christmas too.
• In forty minutes I will have a houseful of guests for Fireworksapalooza!!!!
• It is supposed to rain.
• My house is not really large enough for a houseful of wet guests.
• I got last week’s Favorite Friday Fragmenter award!

• No, I have not started on the margaritas. Yes, I did call my doctor.
• My fragments are so fragmented that I have no more and will now go up and start on the margaritas.

When you already have a wonky and sluggish thyroid and can’t figure out why you’ve been feeling like crap for the last several weeks and just “off” for a few months before that and your husband nobody has the balls to mention you seem “off” and you can’t figure out WTF you ate to cause that weight gain because nothing’s really changed and you can’t figure out what exactly it was that had wheat/gluten in it to make you feel like crap and you fall asleep on the couch at 9:30 only to wake up an hour later for bed and sleep like the dead for over nine hours and still feel like you could sleep the rest of the day and frankly you just want to kick puppies and rip the heads off idiots, then when is the most inconvenient time to finally have the realization hit that maybe, just maybe, your thyroid is frakked up again:

1. The Friday morning of a holiday weekend
2. When your in-laws are visiting
3. The day you’re hosting 20+ people for a fireworks party
4. All of the above

If you picked #4…dingdingding!!!! You win!!!! Your prize is to beat me over the head with my bottle of Synthroid!!!! That sound is my head repeatedly hitting my desk in “duh.”

Have a great and SAFE 4th of July weekend. I’ll be drinking margaritas starting in 3…2…1…now, so I can’t blame my “I feel like crap” on the tequila and not my idiocy. Oh, and calling the doctor. Yes, I’ll be doing that before the tequila.

It was the Fourth of July.  The band was in their shirt sleeves and getting ready to rise for the director. The oboist was setting up his tuner and sounding the Bb. But it was wrong, so he tried a new reed. As he put the reed into his mouth, he accidentally inhaled it and began choking. The desperate oboist threw his music stand to the ground and stomped it to bring attention to his desperate situation. The band director stormed over to give a lecture to what he thought was an outburst from yet another temperamental oboist.  But he saw the poor guy was choking and turning purple.  By now the oboist was on the ground and pounding the  floor of the gazebo. The band director quickly dialed 911 and explained the situation to the dispatcher.  The dispatcher reassured the director that help was on its way.

“Do you know what to do until we get there?” asked the dispatcher.

“Yes!”  replied the band director. “We are going to use a muted trumpet”.

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And if you get that joke, you’re a band geek.

It’s summer!

How do you know, Jen?

It’s July 1st! It’s going to be 95F today! Both boys are on electronics blackout until tomorrow night for disobedience!

Whee!

Today marks essentially the halfway point of summer. The boys have been out of school for roughly six weeks, and return to those hallowed halls in roughly six more. (And as an aside, those construction workers had better start hauling ass here pretty soon to get those classrooms done!) In a few days we celebrate the Fourth of July and then summer just zips by. Right now we’re just in the slowest part of the summer. I intended to sign the boys up for swimming lessons for this week and dropped the ball on that, so we’re not doing a whole lot right now. My in-laws get here tomorrow night for several days, and that will break up the monotony for the boys. It also means I won’t be getting a hell of a lot accomplished until about this time next week.

Gah. Note to self: remember to put in the sugar when you make iced tea. Bleh.

And further proof that I’m just slightly behind the times, I finally surfed on over to Pandora and fell in love. Internet radio is the most beautiful thing…ahh…

One last thing. I’m actively working on being more productive. Stunner. I’m already incredibly organized (and you can ask anyone who knows me about that!), but productivity could use a little work. I’d love to have your fave productivity suggestions. Anything, for any aspect of life. And now time is up for writing, just in time to hit post.